Rooted In the Word

For those of you keen in reading the New Testament in a year, this site may provide a little inspiration and guidance. (:

sofagang.wordpress.com

comments are welcome, please give me a hand as well (:

Remember, it’s important to know the Word of God well, it’ll keep you afloat in the years to come!

stormy weather friend

if u’re feeling alright,
persevering in the faith,
pushing on with joy
why do i speak and talk
and insist that somehow there must be something broken?

it’s pride that gets in the way
wanting to be the one who lifts your moods
wanting to be the one who comforts and prays

but where there’s perseverance
teach me Lord to rejoice!
though you receive glory when i comfort another
the glory is Yours – all the more –
when u do it without me
i must decrease
and You must increase

teach me joy for your work in others
joy for your work through others

teach me to look out with the same eagerness
for lives that display signs of your grace
rather than only look out
for lives that are broken

looking behind, looking ahead

In university, it’s impossible to remember every detail of your course material (it might be possible if you run on no sleep/have 48 hour days/are not human). So I find that prompt/cue words help a great deal. A simple cue word may very well trigger off a cascade of thoughts, facilitating recall (evidence of my time studying ‘learning and memory’ for the experimental psychology course, haha). Looking at my 2010 diary entries, many entries are speckled with cue words that are supposed to trigger off vivid memories of important past episodes. I guess it’s impossible to really sum up the lessons and events of 2010, so hopefully the following broken sentences and incomplete thoughts will help remind me of those things…

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looking behind –

If friendship were a landscape…perhaps, a meadow
Some flowers would have withered
Some flowers would have grown larger and brighter
Suffice to say, the meadow looks different now
And as they would all say – it’s part of life
Most importantly, You must still be at the center.

you always go back to making the same mistakes, and end up breaking more hearts, letting more people down. a dear friend once told me i should stop picking up so many people, because eventually i leave them behind – crushed and in disrepair. another dear friend told me that it’s ok to not be there for everyone.

thankful Lord, that in spite of my mistakes, you are still in control
thankful Lord for a special friendship forged
thankful Lord that you continue to care for those who i have let down, and can’t be there for;

—

looking behind –

Great joys of new brothers and sisters in Christ
Vic/Calvin/Yuheng/Yiyang
You guys always bring a smile of gratitude, a laugh of thanks to my life
Thank you Lord (: please continue to nurture and grow them in your own ways

Greater love for the church
Greater love for those who labor together for the kingdom
The list could go on forever, so I will not list…but there are many many many (:

Greater realization of the brokenness in people’s families
Parents’ separations/heartbreak…
I need to have greater compassion

Greater knowledge and dependence on your grace
Leaving behind the life of legalism
Praying for a heart that will be broken my my sin
But that will fully know your forgiveness

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Precious lessons about God:

1) The Gospel is central to our faith (1 Cor 15:1-2); keep reminding each other of the gospel! It’s all about Jesus (:

2) The Gospel will be foolishness to the world (1 Cor 1:18-25); but it is God’s job to frustrate the world’s intelligence, so keep preaching.

3) Fellowship with believers is really important. God delights in seeing members of his church support and uphold each other. It’s ok to depend on people as long as you acknowledge God as the source!

4) Suffering is an important part of the Christian walk. Do not be surprised by it. Rejoice in it.

5) Disappointment is the biggest challenge for me, especially with my many expectations; remind me that I should not be disappointed, having received your Holy Spirit as an assurance (Romans 5)

6) God’s grace is always greater than your failure. Do not remain in self-condemnation (Rom 8:1)

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looking ahead – the same struggles. some new ones.

I will still try to be there for more people than I can be there for – perhaps it is pride that motivates me, and that needs humbling from your Spirit, dear Lord.

I will struggle with the same doubts about you. More faith Lord!

I will still struggle in working together with you to love her. I will still struggle with the times you minister to her in a way that I can never. I will still struggle with this envy. Help me dear Lord, more grace.

I will still struggle in loving people, in loving her, and in loving your church. It is tiring business. Help me.

We will struggle from being apart.

I will still struggle with fallen expectations, with disappointment.

I will still struggle with the same temptations.

—

looking ahead – the same assurances

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever (Heb 13:8)

And I am convinced that neither height nor depth…can every separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus (Rom 8:38)

And sure I am with you always, to the end of the age (Matt 28:20)

—

hello 2011 (:

 

 

the shuffle of his feet

in the darkness
sometimes it’s hard to see
the one who walks beside you all the way

his silence is somewhat enigmatic
‘why is he not speaking’
you wonder
occasionally you hear the shuffle of his feet
among crackling, dry leaves

still you walk on
knowing – convincing yourself –
that he is still there

quite often, someone else comes along
‘another pair of feet should drown out the shuffling’
you’d think;
but strangely enough
it doesn’t –
the shuffle of his feet sounds clearer
when someone else is walking with you

and when you’re walking alone again
the shuffle subsides…
but keep listening, keep walking
because he will always be there.

dealing with failure

you could come up with a million reasons
to blame everyone but yourself

you could burrow into your duvet
wishing the trouble would pass

you could look back on fond times
and cry yourself to sleep

or perhaps you should just humble yourself
acknowledging your failing flesh
look to the unfailing God
for the hope of a day
when everything will be ok
once and for all.

friends are not projects

I’m surprised that few people have shared their feelings on this matter. I find it such a difficult struggle for myself; surely many Christians feel the same way? Christian love is, on one level, so easy to understand. But on another level, it is layered, complex, and puzzling to both the lover and the loved.

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Christian-Christian friendships

A friendship between Christians is relatively simple. Both persons know that the origin of their love is God. Both persons know that the ultimate aim of their friendship is to see God glorified. Neither person wants to become an idol for the other. Both acknowledge that their love is only a reflection of a greater Love. There is genuine enjoyment of each other’s company, and they need not always be talking about God. But what will be foremost in their minds is the spiritual well-being of the other party – for spiritual health is eternally significant, while worldly happiness is passing.

When I am loved by a Christian friend, I give thanks to God – for He has showered His love upon me through my dear friend. I understand that my friend loves me, but that he also loves God more than me. In that sense, God is more important to my friend than I am. My friend’s love for me is also an expression of his love for God, but that does not diminish the authenticity of his love for me – in fact, because it originates from God’s love, it is all the more greater.

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Christian and NonChristian Friendships

Here’s where it gets sticky. And I think the stickiness stems out from the difference in Christian and non-Christian mentality toward love.

For non-Christians (especially those who don’t believe in God), we love another person for who they are. We love the person because we enjoy the time we spend with that person, because they bring us joy. And we long to do the same in return. We want to let them know that they are important to us.

For Christians, we love people also because we enjoy their company. However, above all, we also hope to point them to the all-surpassing love of Jesus Christ. They are important to us, but not as important as Christ.

What results is that sometimes we Christians tend to make projects out of our friends. It is tragic. We start to love them for the sake of bringing them to Christian group, or so that we can get close enough to them to talk to them about Christ. Non-Christians are not blind/oblivious, they know when we have ‘hidden motives’ behind our loving actions.

This may be a controversial point – but I think that our natural inclination is to want to feel important to another person. We like it when someone considers us important enough to give time/energy/love to us. For Christians however, we try our best to make Christ the most important in our relationships. We constantly pray that to feel important will not be the aim of the relationship.

—

I’m guilty of sometimes treating people as projects.

Once the objective of leading them to CG/CF or telling the gospel has been achieved, I cut down on the time spent with them. Perhaps it stems from a desire that Christ would become more important to them than myself (i’m dispensable but Christ isn’t). But I realize that it sends across a horrible message. It tells the person that the only reason for the friendship was to share God’s love with them. It tells the person that they were not as important to me as was the objective of spreading the gospel.

I think great humility is required to receive Christian love, because Christian love says: ‘Christ is more important than you‘. But I think it’s important to remember that ‘Christ is more important than you’ does not mean ‘you are not important at all’. Perhaps non-Christians need to learn this humility. Perhaps Christians need to be clearer in how they express their love, so that they do not make the mistake of treating their friends as projects.

—

I realize that i’m still very muddled over this matter. I just really pray and hope that i’ll be able to love people authentically, and share my life with them – only through that can Christ be truly glorified.

Christ loves us deeply. That deep love brings him glory, but that does not diminish the authenticity of his love. But it takes great humility to accept that we don’t deserve His love at all.

the struggles of a Christian biologist

it was only a matter of time before these struggles would be shared. i know that i am not alone, and so i pray that through this sharing, many may be encouraged that they are not alone. i pray that many will be encouraged that this intellectual struggle does not mean the death of faith, and that this struggle can coexist with a growing faith – but only by the grace of God.

—

It was only two years ago that i really began being exposed to the ideas of evolution. Prior to that, i had not really considered all the implications that evolutionary theory had for my Christian faith. Then in Cambridge, i took a year-long course on Evolution and Behavior, which exposed me to ideas from human anthropology as well. There, I heard from lecturers on the evidence supporting the evolutionary process – from molecular evidence (how similarity in DNA correlated to relatedness between species), to vestigial/’poorly designed’ structures (which support evolution, since natural selection does not yield optimal designs), to fossil and DNA evidence about bipedal homonids and all.

I did relatively well in the exams (thank God!), but there was always (and still is) an ongoing struggle within me – deep questions which I asked. Questions that I did not have the answers for.

I hope to share some of these questions in this post, and some brief reflections. The reflections are not meant to be exhaustive, and not meant to provide substantial answers. They are just there to reflect the honest struggle, and maybe some of you would like to chat about it some day with me (:

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1) The Genesis Creation Account

Young Earth Creationists (YECs) take this passage literally, believing that God made the earth in six 24-hour days. But scientific studies suggest that the earth is much older than that suggested by the Genesis account – billions of years old. So there are ‘Old’ Earth Creationists, who believe that the ‘days’ in the Bible refer to longer epochs of time.

There are many other problems – for instance, why two creation accounts that apparently contradict?

Increasingly, there is the view that Genesis 1 and 2 should not be taken literally, and that it should be understood in the context of that time. The Genesis creation account was not written in response to Darwinian evolution – it would be absurd if such a concept was brought up in that era; rather, it was written in response to other Ancient Near Eastern literature, which also had their own accounts of creation.

Several ancient Near Eastern creation accounts write that the earth, and mankind, were created as a result of a struggle between divine powers. It was a result of the conflict between gods. The Biblical account stands in stark contrast to this – God is the only unopposed god, who creates the universe out of his own pleasure and will. Mankind is created for a special relationship with Him.

My struggle is whether to take Genesis literally or not. To be honest, I increasingly believe that the Genesis creation account was not a literal description of how the world was formed. Rather, it establishes theological truths that God is the Sovereign Creator, and that mankind was made for a special relationship with Him. Also, the problem of sin is made clear.

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2) The Origin of Man

It would be so much easier if I could just believe that Adam and Eve were historical figures, who were created out of dust and soil, into whom the breath of God was breathed. But again, there is the struggle, for there are definitely fossils of other bipedal organisms, there are definitely studies that suggest that humans were not the only bipeds – for instance, there were Neanderthals. And if humans originated from a process of evolution, then it would be difficult to believe that Adam and Eve were the ‘first’ humans.

Maybe Adam/Eve were symbolic? But many have said that this poses problems for NT passages where Adam is treated as a historical figure – the genealogy of Christ/Romans 5 among many.

I have a lot of sporadic thoughts on this matter:

• What distinguishes man from other organisms is the level of consciousness that he has been given. His awareness of good and evil, his ability to understand language – and hence communicate and have a relationship with God. I believe that this degree of awareness was unprecedented before humans.
• At some point, God endowed this ability onto mankind; at some point, mankind sinned and so acquired the awareness of good and evil.
• What is important is that at some point in history, such an organism appeared – humans. What is also important, is that at some point in time, this organism became aware of right and wrong.

—

3) Problem with Pain/Suffering/Death

Another problem with evolution! If evolution was the process by which organisms were brought about, then death and disease probably existed BEFORE the fall of man. I think C.S Lewis also struggled with this matter, as apparently in his book ‘The Problem of Pain’ (which I hope to read soon).

But the Bible so strongly connects the world’s suffering to the sin of man! The Bible so strongly connects the suffering of creation with the fall of man (Romans 8:18-25, where creation is subjected to suffering until the revealing of the sons of god). I’m not sure how all this really comes together

I guess, what’s important is that at some point in history, natural suffering (floods/disease…) became linked with moral suffering. At some point in time, mankind acquired this awareness – that the tragedy of moral suffering is reflected in the tragedy of creation’s suffering!

Through the imperfect creation, God hopes to bring all of us to a realization of our moral poverty and need, so that we might be saved.

—

so there, some difficult questions, with some inadequate answers. many thoughts on the various matters remain unexpressed. perhaps they will come to mind some time in the future (:

at the end of it all, the truth of Jesus Christ and his resurrection must still be grappled with! The central question of Christianity is not about how the world came to be, but about what the world’s state is. We are all, if we search deeply, in a state of need, and only Christ has offered an eternal hope, evidenced through his resurrection (if that is untrue, then we are truly fools)

a fragile joy

is joy a feeling?
is joy knowledge?
it seems so easily shattered.

emerging from morning prayer
galvinized to serve.
not exactly ‘full of joy’
but struggling,
praying that the Lord may fill one’s heart with
expressions of joy

sometimes joy feels hard-earned
though one knows it comes by grace

yet all it takes is the wrong side of bed
my mum telling me i need to go out to run errands
and so cannot stay home to do
the things i felt galvanized to do

that’s all it takes, to shatter the joy

perhaps fragile joy isn’t authentic joy.

How can one have faith?

Hopefully by now, most people have realized that faith is not merely ‘believing without evidence’. Recently, I was asked to talk on this topic, and I realized that it was not an easy question to answer. Just thought I’d pen down a few of my honest thoughts, and hopefully it’ll be a help to people like myself who often struggle with faith, and a help to those who are sincerely looking for a way/reason to believe in Christianity.

Faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the Word of Christ

Romans 10:17

1. Faith comes from knowing the message

Faith requires knowledge. This is important for any ‘seasoned’ believer as well as anyone exploring Christianity. You cannot have authentic faith if you do not know what is it that you are believing in. For believers, it is important every day to remind yourself of what you believe in – the gospel message of God’s relationship with man, broken by sin, restored through Jesus. For non-believers, it is important to actually know what the gospel is all about before you make your decision to accept or reject Christianity.

Specifically, knowing the message does not mean just hearing it second-hand from other believers. Knowing the message means getting down to the text that contains that message – the Bible. Knowing the message means diligently studying and exploring the Bible text, and realizing for yourself what it says. For believers, this means that faithful reading of the word each day is important, not just going to church and listening to sermons. For non-believers, this means that you ought to explore the Bible for yourself, not just listen the preaching of Christians (and writing it off as overzealous proselytizing).

A lot of non-believers ask valid questions about the faith and the Bible, however, these are not central questions. Questions like “How about evolution and the Bible – doesn’t evolution show that the Bible is a farce?”, or “How about the contradictions in the Bible?”, or “How do you explain suffering, and how God commanded the death of thousands?”. These questions are valid, but they miss the point of the Bible – which is the gospel. We live in an age where we have the privilege of reading the Bible as a whole, and hence we ought to do so. When non-believers explore the Bible, they ought to explore in light of the overall message of the Bible – that is, the gospel; when this is done, many other questions will be slowly answered.

Grapple with the gospel! Grapple with the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ! The gospel is all about a man named Jesus, who performed many miracles to show that he was more than a man (his resurrection being the greatest miracle). It’s about a man who came to call sinners (Mark 2:17). It is about a man who declared himself to be the resurrection and life and calls us to believe in him (John 3:16).

We should get down to the Bible, read the gospels for ourselves, and see what the gospel is all about. That is the first step toward faith – hearing the message.

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2. Faith comes from Trusting the Message

Having read the message of the gospels, and know what it is all about, we might ask ourselves: ‘How can we trust this message?’ The Bible, after all, was written 2000 years ago by a motley crew of people (people, not God Himself in person!). The Gospels, after all, were written to promote the faith, to declare the deity of Jesus – surely there will be biases? How can one trust the accounts of the Bible?

I do  have all the answers to the historical reliability of the Gospel accounts (please fill me in if you can (: ) But when the New Testament Canon was selected, it was selected based on a strict criteria – the books had to be written by people who had experienced Jesus directly. These people included the disciples who were with Jesus, and Paul – who experienced Jesus in a life-changing vision. The testimony about Jesus came from people who had been with him.

We live in a time where we cannot experience him directly, still, look at the passionate words of the apostle John, one of those who had been with Jesus:

That which was from the beginning
Which we have heard
Which we have seen with our eyes
Which our eyes have looked us
And our hands have touched
This we proclaim to you concerning the Word of Life

1 John 1:1

These disciples actually touched and saw Jesus. They heard his teachings. They carried out his ministry with Him. They saw and felt his risen body. They personally experienced the resurrection. They saw the resurrected Jesus, and were willing to die for Him. Very few men would die for a lie. Either there was a simultaneous delusion, or these were sincere people, who wanted to pass on that which they had experienced – to us living in this time.

2000 years is still a long time. Sometimes I still struggle with this question – can I rely on these accounts? – But it is worth further exploration, and remember that the disciples had seen it, and died for it.

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3. Faith comes from Experiencing the Knowledge

And finally, after one knows the knowledge of the gospel, and has examined its reality, one must experience the knowledge.

Ultimately, you can know all about the Christian gospel, you can see that it is quite reliable – but if you don’t take the first step, you will never know if it is true.

Christians know the gospel, believe it can be relied upon (not without doubts…), but ultimately, they experience it – they experience the liberation that comes from it, the peace in times of adversity, the confidence to face death, the answered prayer of watching another come to Christ, the assurances through unanswered prayer, the joy in the midst of tragedy.

If you cannot take the first step now, then see how the gospel works out in the lives of those around you. Do those who allow the gospel to transform them behave differently? That is an experience of the power of the gospel! Is there a love that Christians exhibit that you cannot understand? That too is an experience of the gospel’s power in their lives. And one can experience it too, if one takes the first step!

And as each step becomes more and more firm, one’s faith grows.

—

mm so ends that. there are many unanswered questions still (: but will fight on!

Christ the Wisdom and Power of God

There’s something about me, the kind of person I am, that I can’t help but get caught up in intellectual debate.

There’s something about me, that I can’t help but ask questions such as:
“Why does God allow natural disasters to occur, and let so many people die?”
“What happens to those who do not hear the gospel?”
“How does evolution fit into the Genesis account?”
“What about morality – was it evolved? – does that make a difference to what I believe?”

I wrestle with God, because I know and believe that what He says its true. And whenever such questions are thrown at me, I need to wrestle, because such questions threaten to shake the foundations of what I believe – That all that God says is true.

I don’t stand alone in this regard. Many Christians think through these questions. To say that Christians are blind believers is disregarding the fact that so many Christians struggle over these same issues as well. We, like non-believers also ask these questions. We, like non-believers also struggle with these queries. But Christians, however, have chosen to concede that at the end of it all – only Christ’s wisdom and power will prevail.

Do I have answers to the above questions? Some thoughts maybe, some ‘answers’ maybe, but none are satisfactory to my heart. They may satisfy my intellect, but they do not take away the gnawing at the heart. I know that God alone has answers, answers that He has chosen to conceal for now. And I trust Him. The only satisfactory answer I have is that I can trust God to defend Himself.

—

I used to fear reading accounts on evolution, feared the new atheism that was rising up against me. I used to fear reading arguments against Christianity, afraid that I would find some faith-shattering philosophy that would destroy me. But here’s the one comfort I hold on to, the one word of God that I cling on to:

For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing
But to us who are being saved it is the power of God.

For it is written:
“I (God) will destroy the wisdom of the wise
the intelligence of the intelligent, I will frustrate”

Where is the wise man?
Where is the scholar?
Where is the philosopher of this age?
Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world?

Here, in the precious words of 1 Corinthians, is a promise. It is a declaration that God will make foolish all the clever arguments of this world. No man can ever understand the mind of God. God has and will make a mockery of all of man’s wisdom.

To those who believe that they can attain their own salvation/holiness – God will make their wisdom foolish.
To those who believe that by invoking evolution, God is nullified and not required – God will make their wisdom foolish
To those who believe that they can do a better job than God (asking questions about God’s justice/love…) – God will make their wisdom foolish

How will this folly be exposed? I’m not sure exactly how. But I think the folly may be this: that no matter what philosophy one subscribes to, there can be no true peace, no true satisfaction, no true meaning in life outside of the gospel of Christ.

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Christ is the wisdom and power of God.

Everyone who opposes the gospel needs to consider Christ. Here, in the fabric of human history, is a man who performed numerous miracles – displaying God’s power. It is a man who’s teaching stumped the teachers of the law and amazed its listeners – displaying God’s wisdom. Most importantly, he was a man with purpose – He knew he was going to die and be raised again.

To all who oppose to the gospel – there is one challenge – Contend with the person of Jesus Christ! Contend with the truth claims of the resurrection! Contend with that gnawing in your heart, that guilt that you face when you sin. Sure, maybe you can explain morality/guilt/religion/belief in God as product of an evolutionary process.

But honestly, does that satisfy you?
Does that give you an answer to the evil around you?
Does that give you the confidence to face death?

I’m not boasting in myself, but in the wisdom and power of Christ.

—

To be honest, I think I can no longer live without Him.

Maybe i’m foolish in the eyes of the world.
Maybe i’m weak in their eyes – a fool who believes in a lie so that he can face death with more certainty and hope.
Maybe i’m weak in their eyes – I concede to my weakness instead of believing that sheer human will can help me redeem myself.
Maybe i’m weak in their eyes – believing in someone I can’t see or hear tangibly

But i trust, that He will defend me.
I have decided that no matter what, I will trust that His power and wisdom is greater.
Even if that makes me look like a fool.

When everything ends. He will stand.
And because He stands, all who believe in him will be vindicated.

The Monster I Fight over and over

I think my blog is probably going to be officially dead soon, unless somehow this post revives it, and sets the precedence for more to come.

The past weeks have been difficult, trudging through a spiritual desert, and clinging on to truths so dear. That dreaded monster appeared again, revisited again, as it always does. It’s visits are never pleasant, they are unanticipated, and so take me by surprise.

That monster is legalism. That monster is my endless need to do things for God. That monster is my insecurity, the burden I thrust on myself. I convince myself that my closeness to God is determined by my ability to fill up a checklist of things-to-do each day. These things include a 1 hour Quiet Time in the morning, includes talking to someone about the gospel, includes taking EVERY opportunity to do good and kind works. These things are all great in themselves, and they serve to make one’s election sure. But they cannot become my security, or my salvation, or my God.

But so often they do. And when I fail to tick off a checkbox, I am overcome by a deep sense of guilt. This guilt is like a migraine that gnaws endlessly at the heart. It grips me and doesn’t let me go. It triggers off an endless chain of ‘what ifs (i did this or that)?’ It tells me that I’ve let God down, it tells me that God frowns upon me and is displeased with me. This guilt disables me, and confuses me. This guilt paralyzes me.

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There is no condemnation in Christ Jesus.
We are saved not because of the righteousness works we have down
Our righteous works are like filthy rags before Him
We are saved by grace – through faith, and this not from us, it is a gift of God

These truths remain firm. But then I realize how little I’ve put my hope in them. I realize sometimes that the fundamental foundations of my faith are still so weak. Every now and then I go back to reexamine my foundations to find them cracked, broken and begging for repair. Sometimes I find that they have all been built with the wrong material.

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Thank u Lord. Thanks for shaking my foundations. Thanks for always reminding me that I need to build my faith upon your grace and nothing else. Thanks for helping me find security and love in your promises rather than in my works. Please help me to throw off this legalistic lifestyle that entangles me, that cheapens the grace of God and Jesus’ sacrifice, that empties the cross of its power. Please help me to know the abundant life that Jesus promised to all who believe. Please let me know the yoke that is easy and the burden that is light. FREE me for joyful obedience, not slavish, guilt-driven obedience.

Amen.